hmmm

So my mother has a boyfriend..or male friend. I'm trying to be positive and like him but I don't. Or maybe I don't like who she becomes around him, very forgetful and dismissive. I am ready for him to take his exit. I could be "hating" because my relationship is slowly falling apart. This ex-boyfriend of mine is reminding me why he's my ex!! So annoying, planning a simple trip is more trouble than its worth and I just want to blow the whole thing up. I constantly call him, but he never calls me back..childish and immature I tell you.

The weight loss has been good so far, I've been working out and eating well and I have two events coming up this week so I'm hoping to lose 3-4 pounds this week. I think I can do it. I'm doing tae bo in the morning or mid afternoon and running at night. The running has really helped so has eating balanced meals and my stomach condition has stopped as well. Just checking in, not sure if anyone is reading this but its nice to vent on here:)

sad sad SAD

i am wearing a size ten dress that I had to let out to the wedding..depression isnt the word..

I am fat with eye issues

It seems like this blog is turning into a weight blog..not my initial plan but my weight is my major struggle. Sometimes I feel like I can put on ten pounds in a matter of hours. I often wonder if I have a thyroid problem and why its taking so long for the weight to come off. Today is not a good day but I will hold my head up and keep moving forward. I am drinking a slim fast shake for breakfast and I just had my 2ND cup of Green Acai tea. I'm at the place in my tea ministry LOL that I can drink it without any sugar or milk. WOOOO that's a biggie. I plan to work out today..to be honest I haven't worked out since Wednesday after the dress fiasco I've kind of lost interest in sweating..but I have kept to my diet. My eyes are killing me..I'm not sure if I've mentioned that I have Kerotacuonus..major eye disease..so double vision is a biggie in my world..since I've lost my right contact (to be honest I never wear them) my left eye has been tearing up and just aggravating me..ARRGGGHHH I'm not having a good week and I have a sneaking suspicion that my period is about to start. Oh well..if anyone has any tips for losing 20 pounds in week hit me up in the comments LOL...no seriously hit me up!!

Sometimes I wonder if God is punishing me from having the body I want..I know that's crazy but sometimes I wonder:(
'

I decided NOT to work

I know I am in need of money..but I'm also in need of peace. Which I think outweighs money any day. I have a lot of work to do, getting my classes in and packing and organzing so I don't have time to be strapped to the dorm. Quite frankly I don't want to work with these two ladies either. I don't hate them but I cannot allow my blood pressure to raise because of them. I am hoping that t he next week goes by quickly and that I'm in the safe and capable arms of my mother. I totally lied to her about the dress but I'm hoping on Saturday I can go and get it looked at. I have no transportation right now and begging people isn't my style. So that's what's up right now.
I also made this "interesting drink" for breakfast.

Ingredients

3 leaves Kale
2 strawberries
Soy Vanilla Milk
a shake of Slim Fast Chocolate powder
and water/ice cube
half a banana

At first without the banana it was gag worthy now its tasty. I'm almost done and i feel "clean". This road to health is going along swimmingly and I wish I had started sooner.
Well I'm going to patiently wait on my mama so she can give me her visa so I can order these classes..
I'll be back ( how Terminator of me) lol

not super fat fat just fat!

So the dress does not fit...Lord have mercy..I'm planning to bring "the dress" to Modern Bride so hopefully they can pull some fabric out so I'm praying that goes well. I also have a work conference coming up so I'll be in Michigan for most of next week. I also have a lot of school work to catch up on..thinking about it makes me sweat. I'm still keeping a polite distance at work and just trying to get out of here the fastest I can. I think being away for a few months will really help and just give me some much needed time to relax.

My Boo is gone!!! He drove up to Chicago for his son's graduation. He did not ask me to come at all. I don't think I'm good enough for his family. I'm not shocked at all and mind you he took my car out there, but hey you do what you gotta do. I'm sure the relationship is ending soon so there is NO NEED to fret the small stuff. I was wondering..is anyone reading this...I don't see a section for comments so if someone is reading this..can you email me at blazin73@hotmail.com and let me know if you can comment. I would really appreciate it. Man I'm hoping I can lose another 6 pounds by this wedding..but I don't know. My eating has been pretty good..I'm slightly obsessed with Navy Beans and Spinach I've been eating that all day. I just had a sandwich actually.
That's all I got!
HOLLA!!!